Hogans Heroes - The Lost Episode

Hogan's Heroes ended its 6-year run on CBS in April 1971. The last episode was scheduled to air on April 15, 1971, but it was shelved by studio executives and loyal viewers of the show never learned the fate of the hilarious men of Stalag 13.

Recently the lost last episode was discovered in the Viacom library. Titled "The Final Solution," the episode featured black & white footage as an homage to the classic film, Judgment at Nuremberg. Its usual laugh track was excluded, and the story featured only war trial footage and a grisly execution scene as the final credits rolled. The show was thought too serious by CBS studio chiefs to air in the time slot immediately before the newly popular Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour.

Here are some stills from the show:

Sgt. Shultz meets with his court-appointed counsel and learns the probable fate of his "I heard nothing; I saw nothing" defense.

Col. Klink in the dock.

Hogan answers questions from prosecutors about Fraulein Helga.

Hogan and Corporal Newkirk reflect.

Nazarenes In Space!

The Nazarine Publishing Company knew one thing was sure in 1968: Sunday school teachers would soon be hauling crates of Bibles to their students living in Moon colonies.

Texas A&M - The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

If you hang out in Texas for any length of time, you'll get exposed to Texas A&M University. It is a large state school that generates legions of proud and boisterous graduates. It is a school defined by its traditions.

Occasionally I find old editions of the school's yearbook. Here are some highlights from the 1943 edition.

THE GOOD

1943 was, of course, a key period of Word War II. Long before WWII, Texas A&M was a male-only military school that trained reserve officers through its Corps of Cadets. Looking at this yearbook you can't help but to wonder how many of the boys pictured gave their lives fighting fascism and Imperial Japan. Two of them - 1943 Seniors Thomas Fowler and William Harrell - were destined for greatness on the battlefield as winners of The Congressional Medal of Honor (you can read their stories by clicking on their names).

Traditions that are still strong are illustrated, such as midnight yell practice -

- the (now-infamous) Thanksgiving bonfire -

- and the Fightin' Aggie Marching Band - a marching band actually worth watching.

THE BAD

Although Aggies hate the admit it, their yearbook used to be called The Longhorn. The school, whose hatred of the University of Texas Longhorns is ingrained even into their school song, "The Aggie War Hymn," changed the name of their yearbook to Aggieland after WWII. Here are some of the lyrics:

Good bye to texas university

So long to the orange and the white

Good luck to dear old Texas Aggies

They are the boys who show the real old fight

"the eyes of Texas are upon you"

That is the song they sing so well

So good bye to texas university

We're gonna beat you all to…

Chigaroogarem , Chigaroogarem

Rough, Tough, Real stuff, Texas A&M

Saw varsity's horns off

Saw varsity's horns off

Saw varsity's horns off

Short! A!

(Seniors: WHOOP!)

Varsity's horns are sawed off

Varsity's horns are sawed off

Varsity's horns are sawed off

Short! A!

(Freshmen: AAAAAA!) (Sophomores: A-A-A-A-A!) (Juniors: A-A-A-WHOOP!) (Seniors: WHOOP!)

THE UGLY

The Ku Klux Klan was reborn in the early 1920's. Unfortunately, it flourished at Texas A&M during that period as a student club called the Kream and Kow Klub. They had a faculty sponsor and appeared in yearbook group photos starting in the 1920's. I understand they took their group photo in full sheets in the 1926 edition. The popularity of the Klan faded in the 1930's, but it persisted on the College Station campus until well after WWII (I've seen the group photo in the 1949 edition). I know many Aggies who have never heard of this unseemly tradition in their alma mater. Here is their 1943 group photo:

UPDATE: an anonymous reader shared these scans of the 1906 yearbook cover and the photo therein:

9 Different Ways Pussy Galore Can Kick Your Ass

Honor Blackman is a British actress that played the most gloriously named James Bond girl - Pussy Galore - in 1964's Goldfinger. Most people know she's sexy. Few know she's dangerous. Here are some pics from her self-defense book. I hope you learn something useful here.

Gift Inscriptions

I'm going to use this space to share the bizarre gift inscriptions I run across. I've kept a similar space for odd photos of authors found on dust jackets that I update sporadically.

Here is a Jehova's Witnesses book that is pretty common. This one was given as a Christmas gift in 1988.

The gift giver included a 5-page, Unabomber-like treatise explaining why the recipient would love the book (because she is a gunslinger), and closes in full-on Christmas spirit: "I'm so tired of Jews and New York. Let's go see the Kremlin."

Here is a cute poetry book from 1937 I picked up:



I imagine Miles (the pragmatist)purchased this while courting Hazel (the romantic). His gift inscription walks that fine line between "I love you" and "You're an idiot."

If this book didn't help him get into Hazel's blouse, I imagine he followed it up with this attempt:

The book -



The inscription -

Dear Hazel: Poetry is a cart for carrying ideas that are too lame to walk on their own. - Friedrich Nietzsche.

Autobiographies

I run in to quite a few autobiographies that are worth reading purely for their entertainment value. Here is this week's gem:


Published by Playboy Press in 1975, it's full of great anecdotes which are beautifully written. Here's the whole number on his first date with the future Mrs. Jimmy the Greek:



And here is the photo I least expected to see (this is not photoshopped)- The Greek riding a snowmobile with Mama Cass:




Coming soon: Howard Cosell excerpts on Woody Allen and George Foreman.

Mind Blowing

From My Library

Finds you keep:

First edition, first printing, 1968 Hardback with dust jacket. Condition: Near Fine in Broadart sleeve.



Pocket Books, 1968. Condition: Near Fine.

Merry Retro Science Fiction Christmas

Behind on my Summer Reading

Most of you have probably finished all of the books on your summer reading list already. I'm close, but have three more that are staring at me from atop my stack of books with only about a week of reading left. One is The Bible, and then there are these:

This one will require some permanent construction changes to my bathroom, but will result in both the removal of the evil inside me and clear my skin.

Slogging through 450 pages of Texas rancher bios is going to be tough, but I think I'll be able to get through it. Looks like I'll be spending a lot of time on my new horizontal toilet (I'm saving Vol. 2 for next summer).

I'll be running short of time when I get around to The Bible, but luckily I found this version which edits the unimportant stuff and illustrates what's left with doodles. This is a version I can understand. I will not worship sock monkeys.

Fun With Nuns

Who was the life of the party at the 1910 Golden Jubilee celebration for the Congregation of the Poor Sisters of Perpetual Adoration of Lafayette, Indiana? I know the answer because I've read the book. You can guess by voting below.

Was it the Foundress, Mother Theresa?

Mother Paula?

Sister Clara?

Sister Alphonsa?

Or was it Sister M. Rose?